Love and Support paid forward.

So, Monday we found out that one of our Elders was really sick and stuck at home. This immediately brought out the Mother Hen in me. One of the things that was drummed into my head from an incredibly young age was that people always take care of each other. We lived out in the middle of nowhere with no Doctors or Ambulance Services, so if your neighbor got sick or needed help, you helped them. It didn't even matter if you liked them or thought of them as friends. In times of crisis, big and small, people came together to help each other out.

So, I fixed a large thermos of soup (Homemade Chicken Noodle Soup) and took it over along with some fresh baked Pumpkin Spice Cookies just to give him something healthy to eat and to let him know we cared about him. Both he and Elder Brown were extremely grateful and even seemed somewhat surprised that I would go to such lengths. I just smiled, nodded and accepted their thanks even though to me it was nothing impressive to do it.

Last night, the Elders were supposed to come over for dinner, but Brown called and told me that Berg's Bug had spread to other Elders so they would be unable to come over. I had prepared my famous 5 Bean Soup and Elder Berg was very excited since he “Hadn't had Bean Soup in forever.” I quickly decided that just because they couldn't come over, it didn't relieve me of my “obligation” to feed them as I promised. So I filled another thermos up with Bean Soup, packed some chips and the Halloween Candy we had bought them in a bag and set out. I stopped by the store and bought them some juice and some apples. I then happily delivered the Booty to the Elders with my dearest wishes that they feel better soon. Again, I was met with thanks and amazement.

I think the Amazement is what surprises me. When I was growing up, we were very poor and really didn't have a lot of food to spare most weeks. Winter was especially hard since we couldn't grow anything to eat so if we didn't grow enough during the Spring and Summer, things got tough. Despite all of this, I have many many memories of my Mom and my Grandmother cooking and delivering food and other essentials to people in our area who were sick and injured. Sometimes it was even delivered on foot if my Dad or Granddad weren't around to drive. Course keep in mind, the ladies didn't walk 5-10 miles to deliver the food, we kids did. :)

Back then, people took care of people in any way they could and I think that is an idea that has slowly lost its glamor over the decades since then. These days, most people are so busy trying to get ahead and to get stuff for themselves that they just don't seem to care about people around them. It is like a veil is drawn over their eyes to the needs of others.

As I have stated in previous blogs, that is one of the things I find most amazing about our Church and the people within it. Everyone seems to genuinely care about everyone else. The Church and its Leaders from the 1^st Prophet we have been so lovingly gifted with down to the Bishops of the Wards truly love and care for the members of the Church. When they ask, “How are you doing? Is there anything we can do to help?” you know that it is asked in complete love and sincerity. All of the Members of my ward and my good friend Stephanie's Ward that I have actually managed to get to know truly seem to care about me and my Wife's well being. The love and support we have received from people who, just a few months ago, were complete strangers is mind boggling and humbling.

So when I help the Elders or anyone else, I don't feel like I am doing anything extraordinary or amazing. All I am doing is taking the love and support learned from my Old Family and from my New Family and paying it forward. I think the whole world would be a little better off if we all paid it forward a little.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen

Home Visit, Spirit Renewed.

Well last night was our first Home Teaching Night and it was a very interesting experience to say the least. Two of my buddies from my Geezer class showed up and spent an hour or so with me and my wonderful wife. We joked and we talked about pretty much everything under the sun. It was amazing.

The main reason I found it amazing is the same reason I find the Church itself so amazing. One of the things I have spoken about again and again both here and in testimony is how much the Church feels like a Family and a Home. Ever since we began this trek, my wife and I have been overwhelmed by the truest sense of love, support and welcome that we have been gifted with from pretty much everyone. Not just in our Ward but in elsewhere as well.

Everyone has heard someone ask, “So how are you doing?” before and knew that the person was just being polite. You knew that they really didn't care if you were suffering or in need, they just asked because it is something programmed into us by society. You knew that the moment they were out of your sight, their attention and concern drifted to other things.

Last night, my Friends asked, “Are you guys alright? Are you doing okay? Is there anything We can do to help?” I almost had tears in my eyes from the sheer sincerity and compassion radiating out from them as they asked these questions. You could tell that these weren't just stock questions asked in rote. When I answered them back with our problems and fears, I could see the concern and kindness in their eyes as they promised to do everything they could to help us.

I think that is one of my main fears when it comes to testimony for people who have no experiences with the Church and its members. How do you get across to these people just how amazing it all is and how loving everyone is? Most of them have had the same cynical and devestating experiences with the world at large that I have and, much like I was, have become hardened to any real chance at love and compassion. So how do you show them the miracle that is our Family? I am a Master of words and even I am intimidated by the job.

I am new to the Church and I still have my fears and doubts. We face many crisises in just a few short weeks that would terrify anyone. Logically I know that so many things could still go wrong and force us to make some very harsh decisions. I get scared every day. It is only my newly rediscovered Faith in God, His Son and this fantastic extended family that we miraculously found that keeps me believing that things will work out okay.

My Friends left us feeling much better and much richer in Faith with nothing more than some kind words, a few spiritual thoughts and their overwhelming love. I am a very Rich Man.

Amen

Breaking Bread

As I mentioned a couple of posts ago, I was recently ordained into the Priesthood and it is something I am incredibly excited about and a little overwhelmed by. So I thought I would at least get a few weeks to adjust to the idea and maybe calm down a little, but that didn't actually happen. Instead, the first chance they got, my friends in the Church pretty much thrust me onto the front lines in a manner of speaking.

So after missing the previous week's services because of my injured foot, (Also see previous post) I arrived at services Sunday with my amazing wife and sat down to wait for services to start. Not seconds after I sat down one of the young men of the Priesthood came up to me and asked if I wished to help prepare and pass out the Sacrament. I immediately said sure even though I was suddenly very very nervous.

Even though both of the young men who prepared with me were very supportive and even tried to relax me by making a few very quiet jokes, I was abjectly terrified the entire time I was up there. I was convinced I was going to mess everything up and doom everyone to ever lasting torment because they didn't receive proper Sacrament. Even though I was incredibly proud to be standing up there and doing such an important task, I can honestly say I have never been more relaxed as when it was all over and I could return to my seat.

Still, I guess this is just another aspect of just how quickly my life has been changed since we began this Trek months ago. To me, it seems like only days since we first started investigating and mere hours since we were Baptized. To be inducted into the Priesthood and to be given such responsibilities in so short a period of time just adds to that seemingly breakneck speed.

I am impossibly proud of the gifts and honors that have been given to me. The trust and faith that so many people have shown in someone that they barely know is overwhelming. I will do everything in my power to be worthy of all of it and will work as hard as I can to keep advancing along my Trek. I just hope I am worthy of what has been given to me.

Amen

I just want to work.

I am facing a severe test of my recently rediscovered Faith right now. Part of me is truly struggling with all of the decisions we have made in the past few months and wondering just how things can possibly work out for us in the months to come. Right now, things do not look well and I am very much afraid that we will lose everything unless something just short of a miracle happens.

We knew that it was a potentially dangerous thing to do when we moved from Georgia to Woodbridge, VA. We had a house note there and were taking on a brand new house note here with absolutely no chance of selling the old house in GA. I had been unemployed for nearly 5 years in GA and knew that we would face serious hardships here in VA unless I could miraculously find some sort of employment here. We both agreed that, despite all of the possible issues, moving to Woodbridge was the best thing for our family.

Now after three months, I am worried. Despite my best efforts, I have yet to find any sort of job here. Our money is running short and within a few months we will be faced with some very real financial problems which could include losing one of our homes. I pray every day for some sort of guidance or help, but so far we are still struggling.

My Mother always used to say that “God never gives us an obstacle to big for us to overcome.” and I truly believe that, but I still worry. Everything in our future right now hinges on me finding a job, any job and so far I have found nothing.

The most frustrating part to me is the fact that I truly want to work. I don't care what kind of job I have or really how much it pays. I just want to work. Daddy taught us that a man who cannot work and take care of his family really isn't much of a man at all and I believe that is true. I am healthy, intelligent and willing to do any job anywhere, but I can't find a job. Before we moved it was annoying and inconvenient. Now with all of our new expenses and such, it is life threatening.

I am trying to have faith that things will work out. I keep praying for the strength to keep moving forward. It is selfish of me but I pray often for God to help me find a job, any job. So keep me in your prayers and maybe put in a few good words for me. God knows I need it.

Amen

Riding with the Missionaries

Last night, I had the privilege of riding with our two amazing Elders to visit some of the folks that they are teaching to help them find their way home again. It was a fantastic experience where we spent over an hour speaking to a wonderful woman and I am richer for the experience. I was there when she picked the date for her Baptism and even jokingly demanded an invitation to which I was assured I would have “a front row seat.”

The trip only reinforced my respect for all our our Missionaries which was already very substantial to begin with. It was cold and windy, but they soldiered on even though both were very uncomfortable. I have seen our Missionaries out in the worst kinds of weather possible doing everything they could to bring help to those who needed it. The first time I met our new Elder, Elder Berg he and Elder Brown had literally walked through soaking rain just to be with us that night. He literally looked like someone had tried to drown him.

I use the word determined a lot when describing the Elders and Sisters of the Church and it is a good solid word for them. Most people, myself included, would look at some of the things they do and think, “I could do that or I could stay in here where it is nice and dry and have some more Coffee Substitute.” Or “Yeah I could go out and try to reach people and help them, but it is cold and nasty outside so I will go tomorrow or the next day.” You don't ever see the Missionaries doing that.

Now I cannot say that the thoughts don't occur to them every now and then. They are human just like the rest of us so I am sure there are days they would much rather stay in bed and sleep than go out in rain/snow to perform their works. However, these brave and determined young men and women move beyond those impulses because they truly believe in the duties they have been given. In an era where so many young people want nothing more than to sit at a computer and play games all day, this ethic borders on the miraculous.

I keep hearing about the missions that I might be able to go on one day in the future and I am both excited and humbled. I am unsure if I can ever show the courage and dedication that I have seen not just in the young Missionaries, but in most of the people I have met in the Church. I am just going to have to keep learning both the lessons and the examples that are being shown to me and Pray that I am up to the task when the time comes.

Once our evening was over with, the Elders seemed surprised when I asked them, “How soon can we do it again?” I am eager to keep learning and growing so I might be worthy of the amazing gifts that have been given to me.

I say these things in the Name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Cake and soup= LOVE

As I mentioned in the last piece, I recently did some severe damage to my right big toe. It is healing very nicely and the pain is much less than it was the day after the accident. I want to thank all of my readers who sent me well wishes and prayers, they definitely helped.

So because of the pain medications I am on, I missed Church this last Sunday. I was very sad because I look forward to services every week, especially my Geezer Class with the other Old Timers in our Ward. I did send a text to our Elders and asked if they could stop by that evening to fill me in on what I missed and just to cheer me up. They texted back a perky “Sure!”

So that evening, I get a phone call from our marvelous Sister Missionaries asking if they could stop by and see how I was doing. I told them they were always welcome. So these two amazing young ladies showed up with huge smiles on their faces and a mondo chocolate cake in their hands. They stayed with us for about an hour cheering me up and talking about Faith. I was sad to see them go since I very rarely get to spend time with this incredible ladies, but they had to leave as the Elders showed up.

The Elders arrived with two cans of delicious chicken soup and the same smiles and upbeat nature the Sisters had brought. We spent an hour or so just talking and sharing. Needless to say, by the time they left, I was feeling much more cheerful and feeling an almost overwhelming sense of love.

That is one of the most amazing things I have noticed about pretty much everyone I have met since we began this journey. Mormons have an almost overwhelming sense of Community and Family that I find so very lacking in most of the world today. Everyone seems to truly care for one another even when they aren't members of the same community/Ward. I have a grocery list of health issues ranging from Severe Migraines to Diabetes and Weakened Immune System. Every time I am ill (Which occurs on a pretty regular basis) everyone from the Bishop down to the newest Elder does everything they can to make sure I am doing alright.

I am always hearing people say that kindness and compassion seem to be in short supply these days and the news reports you see every day seem to bear them out. However I am certain of one thing. Within my Family, there is a abundance of all of these things and more.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen

Battered but grateful.

Grade A, Number one Owchie!

Being grateful for blessings can sometimes be truly a matter of perception. An event that most people would see as bad or depressing can easily be seen as a good thing if you really stop and think about it. Sometimes you have to stop looking at how bad some event is and realize that it could have been much worse if not for the Grace of God.

The other day, I was in the process of taking the garbage can down to the curb and as I was coming back, I slipped on something very slick and slid back down the hill behind our home. My right toe struck a rock with all of my 250 pounds of weight behind it. The nail was ripped up and folded halfway back over my toe and I am pretty sure the toe has been fractured. I also sprained my ankle in the fall.

Now most people would look at my badly swollen toe and ankle and think, “Wow what horrible luck” and in one sense they would be right. I am 50 year old Diabetic so injuries don't heal anywhere near as fast as they used to and I am in considerable pain even with pain medications given to me by the Doctor. I can barely walk and actually doing much of anything around the house is impossible.

However, I can be grateful to God that it wasn't much worse. I could have broken my entire foot or torn ligaments and such in my ankle. I could have been in a cast for weeks or even seriously injured myself in the fall. As it stands, my injuries were not serious or life threatening and I will heal slowly over the next few weeks.

God looks after us every minute of every day and takes care of us when we need him too. I could have been hurt much worse, but I escaped with minor damage perhaps as a object lesson to be more careful in the future. Thanks to His care and devotion, my greatest worry is what we are going to eat for the next week or so. My wife doesn't cook and I am currently incapable of it. Since I am a cook, pretty much all of the foods in the house require a couple of hours preparation. Money is super tight right now, so ordering out every night is not possible. However, we will make do and I will heal and I remain grateful to God for all he has done for me including watching over me when I took a spill down a hill.

Amen

Inspirations Twofold.

Two truly amazing and inspiring things happened Sunday during services that made me contemplate the courage and determination some people have and also to humble me in a way that I didn't think possible. I left church feeling honored and unworthy of the amazing gifts I had been given.

As services started, I noticed Brother Gezzell escorting an elder woman slowly up the aisle to the front row. Her pace was slow and sometimes unsteady, but her determination was evident in every single step she took. When it came time for her to bear her testimony, she was helped slowly up to the podium where she spoke in a quiet, but strong voice. She explained that she had literally died six times. That is right, in the past she had flat lined more times than most people have gone to the hospital. She spoke of how each time she just wanted to give up and how she was just so tired and wanted to rest.

Then she spoke of how she was told again and again that it wasn't her time. While her heart wasn't beating, she heard that she still had much work to do before she rested. I personally cannot imagine the amount of faith and strength it must take to come back from what lies beyond 6 times. I cannot even begin to understand the devotion it must have taken for her to leave her Heavenly home and return to the world of man and pain. As she finished her Testimony and was helped back to the pews, all I felt was honored to have witnessed such a fantastic thing. I can only pray that I have that kind of faith and strength if I am ever faced with such trials.

After Services Bishop Harding took me to one side and asked me a question that I had been hoping to hear but wasn't expecting to be asked for several more months. He asked when I would like to be ordained into the Priesthood. I think I startled him when I said, “Now!” Still he smiled and went to gather my wife and all of those who would perform the service.

As we sat in that small room with my wife beside me and people I have only known a short time but who feel like old friends, I was struck with the realization of the honor and privilege being bestowed upon me. As Brother Snyder said the words that would change my life forever, all I could do was pray to Heavenly Father that I would be worthy of this honor.

Looking at all of the things that have happened to me, it is hard for me to fathom that it has only been a few short months since I began this Trek. Only three months or so since I questioned exactly what the heck I was doing and if I was doing the right thing. Now I stand with my Brothers and Sisters nervous still, but feeling the courage and strength I need to keep going forward. I thank God and all of those who have helped me find my way.

Amen

A New Edition to the Trek

As I mentioned in an earlier blog, our dear friend Elder Sahagun has moved onto where he can help others the way he helped us. To say that we miss him very much would be the under statement of the century. Still we have the memories we have made with him and those will stick with me for a very long time.

Elder Brown brought over his new companion tonight, Elder Berg and we had a pleasant hour or so getting to know the new guy. I rarely go with first impressions, but my first overall impression of Berg is that he is a friendly and intelligent young man with an excellent sense of humor. He laughed at all of really bad jokes and actually seemed amused by them. Whether this means he thinks I am funny or was simply being polite, I still liked him for it.

I have always believed that you can tell a lot about people from the way that animals react to them. We own a cat who is very skittish and very seldom takes to people right away. With Elder Sahagun, the first time Ferrari met him, he adored him and stayed close to him whenever he was over. The cat's reaction to Elder Berg was practically identical. This tells me that Berg is probably a good man who can be trusted. I like having that foreknowledge.

So many amazing people have come into our lives since we began this Trek months ago. All of the amazing people of our Ward have made us feel loved and appreciated. Total strangers who had no reason to care for us or work to help us. I can honestly say that we would have not made it this far if not for the love and support of all of them.

Now God has brought a new person into our lives and I know deep down in my heart there is much he can teach us and hopefully a few things he can learn from us as well. I look forward to many interesting and uplifting weeks getting to know Elder Berg.

Amen

Baptism Night

     Here are the photos from one of most incredible nights of our lives.  My wife and I and the two amazing Elders (Brown and Sahagun) who helped guide us on this amazing Trek.

Goodbyes are never easy.

How do you say goodbye to someone you have only known a short time, but who has fundamentally changed your life in ways that most people cannot even understand? How do you just let them walk out of your life while being faced with the very real possibility of never seeing them again at least not in this life? It is a question that I never really pondered before, but now I am being faced with a reality that forces me to ponder it.

As most of you know from reading the many steps I have taken along this amazing Trek, I went from a borderline Atheist/Deist to the waters of Baptism in just a few months. So many people have helped me along this path that it would take to long to list them. However, I would have to say in all honesty that most of that work was done by a very small group of young men.

After the wonderful Sisters met with us for the first few times, they introduced us to Elders Sahagun and Gates who began teaching my wonderful Wife and I about the Church, the Scriptures and the Faith. Sadly, Elder Gates had to leave not long afterward and we still miss him, but we got the joy of adding Elder Brown to our lives so there was joy too.

For months Elders Brown and Sahagun worked with us, taught us and became an incredibly important part of our lives. Literally it got to a point that if they didn't come over on Monday which was their day to teach us, the whole day seemed incomplete. They lovingly and calmly dealt with all of my fears and worries and guided me along this whirlwind trek Home. I literally would not be where I am today without them.

Now I am faced with the prospect of losing one of the Elders. Elder Sahagun has been called to serve someplace else and will be leaving our Ward on Thursday. Words cannot describe how sad that makes me. A young man who told me in complete earnestness that he believed helping me find my way home and be Baptized was one of the reasons God sent him to VA. Can you imagine how humbled I felt when he said that?

I can console myself with the knowledge that where ever he is sent, he will be helping people who need him just like he helped me. I can also take comfort that, at least for the time being, Elder Brown will remain with us to keep us going on the right track. I will miss Elder Sahagun(If for no other reason than I “borrowed” his last name for a funny short story I am writing.) and things are going to seem a lot more quiet around here once he is gone, but I thank God that I had the honor of being his student and hopefully his friend.

Amen

Love, Honor and Devotion will lead the way.

Sorry I have written a few days, but I have been battling a really nasty case of the Flu and at my age, that isn't as easy as it sounds. Still a week's worth of rest, some loving care by my amazing Wife and a truly powerful blessing by our incredible Elders last night and I seem to be on the mend. I feel more alert and more awake today than I have in the past week. With the grace and strength of God I will continue to get better.

After watching the Priesthood Conference last night and the first part of the General Conference today, I feel even more inspired and proud than I have over the whirlwind teaching and Baptism of the past few months. Listening to the inspiring stories and talks given by the leaders of our Faith literally gave me shivers occasionally. I think we are truly blessed to have these gifted people helping us and showing us the way.

I think the thing that touched me the most was something that probably seems very simple. As these men who have spent the majority of their lives serving God and Serving the faithful spoke, their voices would occasionally break with the true depth of their emotions. I would think that the vast majority of these speakers were raised as part of the generation that believed that “real men” never showed emotions or never shed a tear in a public place since that would be considered a sign of weakness.

And yet, as each man spoke, his voice would occasionally deepen and become scratchy as he remembered some particularly moving moment in his life. These older Gentlemen stood up in front of thousands live and millions around the world with tears in their eyes and love in their voices talking about just how amazing their lives have been. There was no shame on their faces for being “weak” or doubt in their voices for revealing the highs and lows they had experienced.

A Philosopher once said, “Showing strength real or imagined is simple. It is in our very nature to hide our pain or shame. Only one who is truly strong can stand before his fellow man and show that he is less than perfect.” Even today, boys are taught that showing weakness is unmanly. They are taught that real men don't cry or show their fears. For some reason, this also seems to translate into “Don't show emotions” at least not grand amounts of it and certainly not in public. Some people even find it a little frightening or daunting to show how much they care about the things they love.

So to see these amazing men standing in front of the entire world and being moved to tears and broken voices over their love of God and the lives he has given them makes me think that the path of our Faith and our Church is in good, solid hands because our Leaders have been truly blessed and touched by God.

I say these things in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.